Happy New Year- 2013

Happy New Year!  2013- wow!  Seems like just yesterday we were all worried about Y2K... ha.
I hope the new year finds you well and looking forward to another 365 day adventure.
Well, I am happy to report that 2013 has started off well for me.  My latest scans showed that there are no new tumors, the existing ones have shrunk again (!!!!) and my bones are looking good!
Each time I get a scan I am a nervous wreck.  Feels like a time bomb... but then I get the good news and am good for another 12 weeks.
I also hope that you enjoyed the holidays.  So many of us are facing difficult events from this past year or two and it takes special times like Christmas- when we were all together- to realize how lucky we are.  I feel so blessed to have such great friends and family.  Thank you all.
The holidays were wonderful for us.  Lauren and Cameron were able to join us Christmas day after spending a few days with Cam's family.  Lindsay had a few days off from work- as did Bill and I - so we had some great fun.  We went to Hendersonville to see Bill's mom and dad, and his sister and her husband.  It was very relaxing and we had some good laughs.

Lindsay got a nice promotion at ESPN and is liking the additional $ and responsibility that comes with it. Good job!
Lauren is looking for full time work since passing the Virginia Bar. We are so proud of her.  She is anxious to get her career started- so if you know anyone hiring in the DC area...

Bill continues to travel with his consulting job.  It is so nice to have him working again.  We are both so grateful for the work.  I am at ESPN two days a week cutting head shots.  I am loving it still.

This year I look forward to hearing good news from my cousin,  Patti, who is getting ready for surgery in March.  Please keep her and Wally and her family in your prayers.  It will be a very tough, long operation.  Hugs, Cuz.

Patti and Wally

Jeff and Liz

Adam and Lindsay

This year will be so special as we welcome some babies into our Charlotte family.  Jeff and Liz Seegers and Lindsay and Adam Shultz Nash are expecting!  So excited for all of them- and all of us!  Congrats.




Also we look forward to the wedding of our close friends' daughters- Carolyn Pearce (to Taylor)  and Abbey Cleland (to Anthony).  I love that my friends get to celebrate these wonderful occasions- they will be beautiful brides and beautiful Mothers-of-the-brides.  Congrats to Ann and Kate!

Tony and Bill

Please keep our friends, Tony and Shelley, in your thoughts.  They had a house fire and lost almost everything to fire and smoke damage.  They have a lot of work to rebuild, but thank goodness they are all safe. It is a very tough thing for them and they need our support.
Thank all-
More soon.
Peace.


Betsy

End of summer...

Hi all-  It has been a while so I thought I would drop in and post a little update.
Lauren and Cameron got married.  It was perfect!  The wedding went so well. Everyone had a great time.
They had a terrific honeymoon in the Dominican Republic- in spite of hurricane Isaac.  They are now settled back home in DC.  Lauren is waiting for her Bar results and looking for a job- so please keep her in your thoughts and if you know anyone up there who is looking for a great employee....

*It was nice to have Dad stay for a week after the wedding and visit.  Bill was traveling so we had some nice relaxing time together. A bourbon or two, also.  Cheers!


Bill is back at work and we are thrilled.  It is a bit weird now for him to travel as he has never had that type of job before.  We are doing fine.  The dogs miss him a lot.  Well, Kirby does.  Maggie is enjoying the space on the couch and the bed.  She especially likes having her own pillow...

I am back at work, also!  I love it!!  Feels so good to be busy again and seeing my friends. I missed them all.  Many new faces there, but still plenty of familiar ones. I am feeling terrific and will have my next scans done in October- on the 8th.  I will post results when I see my doc on the 17th.

Lindsay is settled into her new apartment- only three miles from us.  I love having her so close. She has some changes at her job as one of her co-workers left.  They are splitting up the work until a replacement is hired, but I know they can handle it. Some new responsibilities are nice every so often.  Change things up a bit.

We just passed the one year mark for Mom's passing. I went to NH to see my dad and sister and her family.  After a wonderful family reunion with my dad's family on Saturday we took a trip out to Lenox to see the new headstone. If a headstone can be called beautiful then this one is.  Mom would love it. We continued the tradition that my sister Jane and her kids started last year on Mom's birthday- Sept. 16- and had Friendly's Happy Ending sundaes at the cemetery..She would love that, too.
It seems strange to not have her around any more. We all miss her so very much.


I want to let all of you know that my cousin, Patti, got great results from her scans.  The tumor is shrinking and hopefully in a couple months it will be small enough to remove it without damage to her organs.  The liver is already in the clear for her so keep the good thoughts coming.  Thanks.  Good luck, cous.

Peace to all,
Betsy

Lauren and Cameron are tying the knot!!

So excited to be able to post such a happy blog.  One month from today we will all celebrate the wedding of my daughter, Lauren and Cameron Jenrich!  Most of the plans have been made and it is down to the final details form most of us.  Of course, for Lauren- there is a huge "detail" between now and then.  On July 24-25 she will sit for the Virginia bar.  Soooo.......  She is a bit stressed.  The good thing is that the stress from her wedding will seem like a walk in the park!  Ha.   Good luck to you, my sweet girl.  I am confident you will do a great job. 

Now, back to the wedding...  My dress came in this week and I got to try it on- between my CT scan and my bone scan.  I had to wait for two hours and the bridal shop just happens to be literally across the street from the hospital!  So, I went and tried it on.  I LOVE it!  I feel like Cinderella- OK- maybe her much older aunt... but still.  I am so excited.  One of the great things that is a total bonus for us is that all of our family and many of our close friends will be here.  We have enough people staying at the Duke Mansion (where we are having the wedding) that we were able to rent the entire place for the weekend.

As for my scans- I will not have the results for a while but will keep you posted. I have been feeling better these last few weeks than I have in years.  A new food plan for me and exercise is proving to be working.  I am confident that will show in my scans!

Spending the weekend at my cousin Joann's house in Virginia Beach.  All of her sisters are going to be there so I am driving up to see them. It will be a good time I am sure. The Stevens girls always have fun together!

Prayers for my cousin Patti who is now fighting her own battle.  She is having nausea and a great deal of fear.  Please pray for her to have success with her chemo so she can have surgery to remove her tumor.  Thank you all for the support.  It means so much.

Love to all-  Peace.

Betsy

I am back!!!

Hi-

Not sure why but something was going on with my account (unbeknown to me) so they closed my blog.  I got that cleared up and now am back.  I wanted to share my latest news with all of you.  I got scan results today and the bone scan shows scars but no evidence of disease at this time!  The CT scan shows that all of the existing tumors have shrunk again and there are no new ones!!!  Yabba daabba dooo!!!

So great to hear good news.  I actually heard that the scans were good last weekend while in Michigan attending the funeral of my dear friend, Margo.  Yup, breast cancer...  My sweet nurse, Brooke, saw the results when they came in and knowing where I was- and why- she asked my doc if she could call and tell me the good news.  Of course he said yes!  So, I was able to spend some really peaceful time with my Michigan "family" and know that I was not returning to bad news. How kind was that for Brooke to do?!?!  (Oh, and all of you please send wonderful wishes to Brooke- she is getting married this Saturday!! I know she will be a beautiful bride!!)

Brent, Charlie, Ashleigh, Margo and Matt (Ash's hubby)

Saying goodbye to Margo was a tough one.  55 year old, single mother of 4, amazing lady and very special friend. I spent New Year's Eve with her and the kids so we had time to really talk about cancer and dying. I know she is at peace and had no fear other than the sadness her children would feel when she was gone.  They are great kids and a close family. They had one great mom.  There were over 550 people at her funeral- which gives you some indication of how many lives she touched. She said the greatest loss to her would be not ever holding her grandchildren. She did record books for them and put together a box for each of her four kids.  We was so blessed to have her as part of our family. All four of us will miss her and what she brought to our lives.

On to happy things!  I am heading to DC this weekend for Lauren's first bridal shower.  So excited as I will see friends and relatives at my college room mate's house.  Thanks Ann for having the shower at your home. I am sure it will be a very special day for all of us. I will add photos later.  Lauren sent me a photo of her in her gown... whaaaa.... what a beauty.  My baby... This is going to be a really incredible event in August. So special.

Well, off to meet some friends and celebrate my good news.  Welcome back, team!

Me sitting at Joe Biden's desk! 

Peace.

Betsy

Saw this and liked what it had to say...

The oncology world is overdue for an etiquette guide. Unless you're Seth Rogen in 50/50, there's no script for what to say to someone with a life-threatening illness. But if you can avoid saying these 10 things, you're off to a good start:

1. Don't ask, "Is there anything I can do?" unless you mean it. If you do, then just do something! When you're sick, asking for help is tiring -- and it can make you feel guilty or pathetic.

2. Don't ignore someone with cancer because you don't know what to say. Say something authentic and from the heart (just not anything on this list!). The old joke about voting applies: do it early and often. 

3. Avoid questions about mortality. "What are your chances?" and "How long do you have?" are major no-nos.

4. Don't talk about your friend/cousin/uncle who died of the same cancer.

5. Don't use nicknames that refer to the person's disease. They can come off as offensive, even if they're meant as a joke. These are a few names that I've actually been called: fuzz head, baldy, Kojak

6. Don't say to someone who's just lost all of her hair, "You look like [insert: an alien, avatar, Pinky or The Brain, Gollum]." This is not the time for the Beat-poet game of "first thought, best thought."

7. Don't put undue pressure on a patient to change doctors or therapies. You may mean well (and you may be right), but be aware that how you offer input can be as important as what you're offering. What worked for you may not apply to someone else.

8. Don't just repeat phrases like "everything will be OK" if the patient is feeling scared or upset. Instead, just be a good listener.

9. Don't tell someone, "Wow, that sucks" upon hearing of their illness. Yes, we know it sucks. Reminders are not necessary.

10. If you say or do something awkward, rude or out of line, don't pretend that it never happened. Apologize, and ask for a redo! It's OK to make mistakes. Cancer patients are used to these kinds of blunders. We'll understand. Just don't play the ostrich in the sand.

Just saying that you care and are thinking of me is enough for me!  

(Of course, if you are baking and make a few extras...  just kidding.)

Peace.

Betsy

The "Golden(s) Rule"

Golden Retriever Story: Learn From The Children and The Dogs.

. I heard a story, maybe you have already heard it.
So Perfect.

"Being a veterinarian, I had been called to examine a ten-year-old Golden named Belker. The dog's owners, Ron, his wife Lisa, and their little boy Shane, were all very attached to Belker, and they were hoping for a miracle.

I examined Belker and found he was dying of cancer. I told the family we couldn't do anything for Belker, and offered to perform the euthanasia procedure for the old dog in their home.

As we made arrangements, Ron and Lisa told me they thought it would be good for six-year-old Shane to observe the procedure. They felt as though Shane might learn something from the experience.

The next day, I felt the familiar catch in my throat as Belker 's family surrounded him. Shane seemed so calm, petting the old dog for the last time, that I wondered if he understood what was going on. Within a few minutes, Belker slipped peacefully away.

The little boy seemed to accept Belker's transition without any difficulty or confusion. We sat together for a while after Belker's Death, wondering aloud about the sad fact that animal lives are shorter than human lives.
Shane, who had been listening quietly, piped up, ''I know why.''


Startled, we all turned to him. What came out of his mouth next stunned me. I'd never heard a more comforting explanation. It has changed the way I try and live.

He said,''People are born so that they can learn how to live a good life -- like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?''
The Six-year-old continued,''Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don't have to stay as long.''

Live simply.
Love generously.
Care deeply.
Speak kindly.
Remember, if a dog was the teacher you would learn things like:
When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.
Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.
Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure Ecstasy.
Take naps.
Stretch before rising.
Run, romp, and play daily.
Thrive on attention and let people touch you.
Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.

On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.
On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.

When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.
Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.
Be loyal.
Never pretend to be something you're not.
If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.

When someone is having a bad day,
be silent, sit close by, and nuzzle them gently.    

                                               --

Happy New Year!

2012- Wow!!  It has been 2 years now (plus one month) since my diagnosis of the return of BC.  The years have flown by in some regards- but it seems like ages since I was not on any drugs...

I am just letting you know that I am doing well on new drugs. Herceptin wasn't doing it for me so I am taking oral drugs now. I know I mentioned that- but wanted to let you know that right now this is working for me. 

I love that I have something very happy to keep me busy.  Lauren and Cam will marry August 18th in Charlotte!!  We are having a great time with the planning and shopping. I think we are well on our way to having one of the best weddings ever! Love the idea of all the family being together again, too.  

Spent New Year's Eve with a dear friend who has been fighting this cancer battle also. She has had a very tough time of it and she and her docs have decided to discontinue drugs- as they are not helping and she is feeling terrible from them. It was a tough decision for her because of her kids, but she is tired of fighting this damned disease.  I do have to say that it was a true gift to go stay with her for the four days. We had some conversations that were honest and touching. We should all have these discussions with the people who make our lives better. She is a brave woman- a kind soul, a loving mother and an amazing friend. I love her and will miss her dearly. Another friend of mine lost her brother last week to cancer.  My prayers are with her and her family. 2012 needs to be the year of the cure. We need peace for this war. Too many lives are lost each year- 40,000 to breast cancer- and so many more to other cancers. Time to wipe out this horrible disease. Pray for peace, please.